Thank you for your comment.

I do have friends, and I am not alone. I am, however pretty self contained. If there are square pegs that don't fit in round holes, I am happily one of them! I HAVE PREETY MUCH ALWAYS SET MY OWN GOALS AND RULES, LIFE LONG AND i HATE TO BE CATEGORIZE.  lol!!!

I do not attend a church, but am very religious, outside of Christianity.  But I also do not attend a regular place of worship. I am a little bit put off by asking for assistance from a "church" because of paast associations and things taht happened. It makes me prettyu itchy to go running to one, as I feel like ahypocrite, asking .I don;t subscribe to their beliefs and would not like them to think I would because I need them.

Because I have been in the "system" and on assistance for so long, I know alot about what is availa\ble and what isn't. If anything has me stressed out, this is one thing that does. Alot of what is available is difficult to qualify forand I seem to be between the cracks for most things. It;s really frustrating. Alot of the stuff is simply not available ... and though it looks good in print, doesn;t pan out. I am not able to use it. Alot of stuff for the aging is meant for people over 65. I am only 59.

With the economy the way it is, especially here in Vegas, there is a lack of servoces right now. Everyone is real sorry, when they turn you  down, but that's how it is. If you have never personally tried to get the things you need, and you live in middle clkass america, you will find this hard to believe. There is alweays someone more needy tahn youn it seems.

Being a square peg has it challenges. I do not think or believe like others. HAppily so. The counselors I havew spoken to get a little frustrated wiith me because I am not "handle-able. Talking out how I feel never ends up like they think I ought to be and some of their suggestions of how to handle myself won;t work for me. I am not very main-stream in thought. I always am looking for nbetter ways than other people to do most things. I do not have a pack or herd mentality, and just don;t follow most life rules like other people. I use my own interpretations.  LOL! Finding my own way is  ALWAYS best and what I do best.

You know what has saved my sanity? My art5work. Being a jewelry designer, is the way fopr me. It is art, meditation, creativity, possitivity, etc. It generartes enorphins! I swear it does! LOL! It raeches all the way to my soul and heals better than you might think. This is where all my time is spent. Working. Work is soothing and no matter how soothing, it is still work and I feel productive. Alot of the dull stuff in my life gets worked out while I plan and execute pieces of beautiful work, which I can then present to people for their pleasure.  I have designed jewely since 1966, when I was 16. It also helps me financially, spiritually, socially, when I appear at shows, etc.

.There is no better therapy, than "playing" with beautiful materials and having someone appreciate it and wear it.

I appreciate your comment. And know that bI am taking care of me .... I originally thougght by blogging here, that my expereiences might help someone else, . I hope I wasn't wrong.

Rainbow